Revenge
by Wishing-for-a-Zoro-plushie
Summary: No pairings. Sanji gets revenge on Zoro, but, it backfires. Read and see. Rated for language... I think.


**Revenge can sometimes backfire**

You'd think that Zoro would learn that sleeping after picking a fight with someone, was not necessarily the wisest thing to do. Having just been in the kitchen, cleaning up the mess Luffy had made, (really, Luffy had eaten and then bolted, leaving the first mate to clean up after his captain) Zoro had of course, picked a fight with the ship's chef. Let's watch the instant replay, shall we?

Zoro was laid back in his chair, almost asleep when Sanji walked in.

"Hey Marimo. You're supposed to be cleaning up this mess!" the chef growled. Zoro raised an eyebrow and opened a sleepy eye.

"Fuck you." he returned causing Sanji to go beet red and the smoke in his mouth toalmost burn right back to the filter. Next thing Zoro knew, he was face first into the wall, Sanji having kicked the swordsman across the room.

"Asshole!" Zoro yelled when he had gotten up. Sanji grinned. There was a large red mark across Zoro's nose.

On the deck, Nami looked up from her map, looked over at Usopp and called,

"Hey Usopp! Betcha 50 belli that Sanji wins today!" Usopp looked up.

"I'm not taking that bet today!" he returned, fiddling with a weird looking invention.

"Why?" Nami asked.

"Because I know for a fact that Zoro forgot his swords!" and Usopp pointed at the mast where, sure enough, three sheathed katana were sitting patiently, waiting for the return of their wielder.

They wouldn't have to wait long.

Just as Nami went back to her map, Zoro came flying out of the kitchen, screaming insults at the chef until he hit the mast with an unhealthy 'crunch'. Sanji stepped out of the kitchen, lit a new cigarette and then walked back in again, slamming the door behind him.

"Ah, Zoro? You okay?" Luffy asked from his perch atop the rail. Zoro looked around, his eyes swirling and his face almost as flat as a pancake.

"Just fine Luffy." and he collapsed against the mast.

Okay, now we have seen what happened, I guess Zoro didn't technically fall asleep of his own choice. He was really knocked out by a pissed off chef. But, the details aren't important. So, what happens to Zoro when he pisses off a chef?

Answer, well, you'll see.

Zoro was still lying by the mast, only now, his face had reverted back to it's original state and he now had fallen into a deep sleep rather than being unconscious. Sanji, having been pissed off the Zoro had never finished up the cleaning, decided, it was time to stop kicking the bastard's ass, and get a little… revenge.

Mess with the man's head a bit. Of course, Sanji would have to ask the rest of the crew to help otherwise they would just get in the way. So, the first person he went to, was Nami.

"Nami! My gorgeous flower!" Sanji cried, almost skipping over to the orange haired woman who was currently studying the inside of her eyelids.

"What is it Sanji?" she asked boredly. The chef paused.

"I need your help with something." he said. Nami raised an eyebrow from behind her dark sunglasses.

"What?"

"I have a trick planned for Zoro, but, I don't have the proper… resources." Sanji replied. Nami sat up on her deck chair and put her glasses up so they were sitting on top of her hair.

"What kind of a trick are you planning?" she asked. Sanji shrugged.

"A little something that will mess with the bastard's head a bit. Make him freak out a little." the chef replied. Nami paused, thinking that maybe this wasn't a good idea.

"What did you have in mind?"

"Well, I was thinking…" and he trailed off, whispering his plan hurriedly to Nami. The navigator paused a moment and then gave a shriek of laughter.

"That's a good one. I'll need my camera for this. I'll be back in a few minutes. I'll make your… prop, for you." and she hurried off leaving Sanji cooing about how wonderful Nami was.

Zoro woke up, still next to the mast. A cold breeze swept through his hair and he shivered slightly before noticing that he wasn't cold at all on his body. He looked around, the dark obscuring his vision before getting up and staggering through the trap door, down to the cabins.

Zoro crept into the room, and lay down on his hammock, brushing a hand over his face as he did so. He didn't even notice the soft fuzzy feeling of his hand before he drifted back to sleep.

Giggle, giggle.

"Zoro's funny." that was Luffy. What the hell was that stupid kid doing awake at this time in the morning? Zoro groaned and rolled over causing another giggle to come from someone who sounded like Usopp.

"Ah, Zoro's turned into-" SLAP. That had sounded like Chopper and then the slap had sounded like someone slapping a hand over the poor little reindeer's mouth. What had Zoro turned into? The swordsman opened a sleepy eye, glaring at the three other boys standing beside him.

"What the hell are you three looking at?" he growled. Luffy grinned and then seizing Usopp's arm, he dragged the marksman from the room, both boys laughing their damn heads off. Zoro sat up, still not noticing how warm he was and the fuzzy feeling he kept having when he touched his face.

He was about to get up when Nami suddenly appeared in the doorway, snapped her camera a few times and then said,

"Love the outfit." before running off again. Zoro raised an eyebrow. Was everyone going insane on this ship? Wait, everyone _was _insane on this ship anyway. Zoro shrugged, stood up and almost fell over as something restricted his movements.

"What the fuck…?" he mumbled as he looked down. Eyes widened, jaw dropped and let the cursing begin.

"WHO THE FUCK DID THIS!" and Sanji, who had been busy up in the kitchen making breakfast, began to snigger, and then chuckle and then laugh until he had to hold onto the sink so he wouldn't fall over.

"Is Sanji going crazy Usopp?" Luffy asked from where he was sitting at the table. Usopp raised an eyebrow.

"I don't know. But, I wouldn't be sticking around with Zoro in such a foul mood. Dressing him in a bunny suit? That's just like putting a bounty on your own head." Usopp replied. Zoro grabbed the kitchen door and pulled it so hard that one of the hinges popped.

"You…" he growled, staring at Sanji who had finally righted himself. There stood Zoro, in all of his bunny glory. Well, it really wouldn't have been that embarrassing, had it not been for the fact that the suit was pink.

Yes pink.

Zoro's eyes were almost alight with fire as he stomped into the room. Usopp and Luffy both slid down in their seats until they were hiding under the table. Luffy wasn't afraid of many things, but, when it came to Zoro being pissed off, well, even Luffy could get a little frightened of his first mate.

"Luffy, Usopp. OUT!" Zoro yelled, still glaring at the chef. The two boys scurried out the door. They didn't need telling twice. Zoro slammed the door and then all you could hear was bangs, and yells and curses before Zoro walked out again, totally bunny free.

"Hey Nami!" Zoro called. The woman looked up at him from where she was inspecting the contents of a barrel. "You may want to go and help Sanji. Take your camera as well." he commented before walking down to the mast and laying down beside it.

Nami blinked and then getting up she hurried to the kitchen door and peeked in. There lay Sanji, on the floor, the pink bunny suit having been violently shoved onto the poor man's body. The chef was currently unconscious.

"Oh, two blackmail materials in one day." and she scurried off to get her camera.

So take warning young pirates, do not dress Zoro in a bunny suit, or you will have to pay the consequences.

**Okay, that was moderately insane. **


End file.
